


Infinite Possibilities

by TheWorstWaffle



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Angst, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Gen, Hurt/Comfort, Lance Angst, Lance focused, Langst, voltron angst
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-02-26
Updated: 2017-02-26
Packaged: 2018-09-27 02:01:00
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,372
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9945398
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheWorstWaffle/pseuds/TheWorstWaffle
Summary: Lance thinks about his family, has doubts about returning home, doubts about his families likelihood to still be alive.ORLance overthinks his situation and gets homesick and is unable to shake the thoughts off.





	

**Author's Note:**

> I haven't written anything in quite a few months however I have been headcanoning things about Lance's emotions and doubts about his family. This is half based on a Twitter thread I wrote late last night. I'm not completely happy with this however I'm not completely unhappy with it either.  
> https://twitter.com/TheWorstWaffle/status/835691199705010179

“We can finally go home.”

That’s what he’d said while they were having their overdramatic, stare at the sky, cliche moment. What could he say, he was caught up in the moment, he’d never had the luxury to think of going home again, the thought filled his heart with hope, warmth and determination  
Those words seemed to inspire his teammates with their own goals, Hunk’s being most similar to his, go home, see their family, though Pidge was to find theirs now along with Keith too. Shiro, did he even have a goal, something to strive for after this? What’ll happen to him? Too many questions, none of them any of his business.

The battle was over now, Zarkon defeated, they could go home like he’d said. At least, they could if Shiro hadn’t disappeared, maybe he disappeared on purpose, maybe that was his end game.  
No.  
He would have said something, he wouldn’t just leave them without so much as a goodbye. They had to find him, they couldn’t just abandon him, they couldn’t go home, not yet.

Could they ever?

The thought came to him late at night, alone in his room, staring at the ceiling, overthinking, as usual, he was used to it by now but his mind had never gone there before.

It was a valid thought, could they ever truly go home?  
Was there anything to go back to?  
His family, are they waiting?  
Or have they moved on already, buried him, had a funeral for a boy who’d never died. 

The thoughts brought on waves of nausea, it was a sickening thought, they thought their baby boy was dead, lost. They buried an empty casket, he could only imagine the grief his family felt. All because he decided to sneak out late at night, he shouldn’t have done it, maybe if he stayed in his dorm room like the rules stated he’d never have seen Shiro crashing, found the lion, he wouldn’t be here.

The worm holes.  
Travelling through so many must have an effect on the universe, travelling through time and space must come with a cost.  
The paladins hadn’t aged but what about those they left behind, what had become of Earth, was it even still there?  
Was there anywhere to go back to now?

Too many possibilities. 

He could cry, couldn’t he? Lance could cry. Nobody would see him, nobody would hear him. Maybe it’d make him feel better, so he does. He cries, and he lets it happen, he cries out these thoughts, these wrong, bad, useless thoughts. They meant nothing, just his mind playing tricks on him.

“There are infinite possibilities!”

Slav was right, Lance thought to himself, wiping his tears and snot on his sleeve, he hated to admit it but that irritating little scientist was right. There really were infinite possibilities. One included his family, safe, waiting for him, and God he hoped he was in the reality where that was the case.

Sniffling, the boy sat himself up in his bed, he couldn’t help but chuckle at the state he was in. What would Keith say if he saw him like this, tease him most likely. He’d never hear the end of it.  
Lance sighs and pulls himself over the side of the bed, his head foggy and his vision blurred from tears, he had to clean himself up, what was the time now, almost dinner, that gives him enough time.

The boy lets out a shaky breath and opens his- no, not his, the bedroom door, peeking his head around the corners, hoping nobody was around and luckily nobody was. He’d have to go fast if he didn’t want anyone to spot him.

Jogging, not running, he made his way to the bathroom, grabbing a flannel and soaking it in cold water, dabbing it at his eyes and clearing his face of any traces that he was upset. It was funny, how easy it is to pretend that everything is alright, back to normal, without anyone finding out.  
He looked at himself in the mirror, groaning internally as he realised that he’d have to redo his makeup, not that he wore much, but it was still an inconvenience, guess he’ll have to think about that the next time he has a breakdown huh?

It didn’t take too long, though, over time he’d grown quite fast when it came to applying makeup, after all, he’d learnt from the best, his sister- no. No, his brain was not going there again. If he wanted to keep himself happy he would have to learn to control his thoughts. He’d have to learn to move on from his family. Not forget, no, he could never forget them, just move on.

Refreshed he made his way back to the eating area, not quite a dining room, it wasn’t homely enough for that, maybe he could change that, with Allura’s permission of course.  
They greeted him, they being Hunk, Coran and Pidge, Allura and Keith rarely acknowledged him when it wasn’t to make a jab at him, especially not now, Shiro’s disappearance clearly had an effect on Keith, maybe the realisation that he was going to lead was finally starting to dawn on him, and maybe Allura’s concern was causing her silence too.  
He took his place beside Hunk, smiling at the larger boy, who smiled back down at him in his classic friendly giant way.

Food goo could never compare to what he had back home, no, no- his mind was going back there again. Why was it so hard to move on? It wasn’t like he was trying to think of them, it just happened, everything he looked at seemed to remind Lance of his home, of his family.  
He wished Shiro was with them, he could talk to him about it, everyone else had been reassured by Shiro at some point, wasn’t it his turn? He needed him.

Hunk, bless his soul, seemed to notice Lance was spacing out and placed a soft, gentle hand on his shoulder, squeezing it to bring him back.  
Lance looked up at him, eyes suddenly more alert, brought back from his mental wander, he smiles and nods a small thank you to him.

Maybe he could talk to Hunk, they’d grown up together, and he’s left his family too, noted they weren’t the best family but he must still miss them. Hunk was always happy to help too, he was kind, comforting and safe, like Shiro but instead of a comforting moonlight, he was more like the sun.

So after they’d eaten he followed Hunk to his room, knocking gently and sitting down beside his friend. Hunk knew what to do, he wrapped his arm around Lance’s shoulders and pulled him close, “What’s got you so down buddy?” he spoke, softly, rubbing Lance’s arm to reassure him.

It took a moment for Lance to think of an answer he was happy with, he had never been good at sharing his feelings, “I miss my family Hunk. I want to go back to them, but now Shiro’s gone I.... I don’t think I’ll ever get to see them again.”

Hunk understood, of course, he understood, he always does, he sighs gently and nods, “I know you miss them. I miss mine too. I’m sure Pidge misses their mother too. We all have someone to miss. Even Keith does now with Shiro gone, and I know you miss Shiro too, even if you’re not letting it show.”

Lance never knew how Hunk knew exactly what to say and when to say it, he always managed to find comfort in his words, “I do miss him. I really do. Part of me thinks he’s gone, for good, but the other part of me hopes he’s out there somewhere. I guess that may be how our parents feel about us. Maybe… Maybe if we find Shiro, if there’s hope there then there’s hope for us.”

He was never very good at saying his thoughts, they always came out jumbled, confusing, although Hunk knew what he meant, he was used to Lance’s jumbled words by now, “There is hope for us Lance, I know it. You know it too.”


End file.
